the visitor

Every month a strange thing invades our home. It occurs every 28-32 days and lasts for about a week. Last Saturday night it intruded on a lovely date DJ and I were having at the Elephant Bar. Out of nowhere it showed up and tried to ruin our evening by causing an argument. It doesn’t play fair! It causes grown women to break down into tears for no apparent reason and grown men to run for the man cave. It demands chocolate and Mexican food every day it's in town. It interrupts our romance and causes drowsiness and moodiness. It does not apologize for its behavior, simply arrives when it wants to, causes a ruckus and leaves again, promising to return again next month. As soon as it leaves everything and everyone goes back to normal. We are happy and content and don’t argue much at all and the romance returns just as suddenly as it left. Some consider this thing to be a blessing and others a curse. Every woman, and every man living with a woman is familiar with this thing. "What can we do to stop this?" you ask. I wish I had the answer for you. At this point all we can do is close our eyes, cover our ears, and wait it out. Oh, and keep the cabinets stocked with Toblerone bars. That seems to keep it happy. This month its arrival was marked with a little smiley face on the calendar so that next month we will be more prepared for it and not so caught off guard.

~Mrs. P 

O, the visitor. How can one truly be prepared for the arrival of the mother of argument, the child of outburst and the father of breakdowns? It storms in on the winds of emotional instability and leaves the wreckage of whatever was in its path. Dates and holidays have been it's victims and it leaves no prisoners alive. A lot like the arrival of a tornado it comes unannounced and like the unwanted family member during the holidays, can't leave soon enough. Once peace in the valley has set back in, it's like the end of a Charger season, we only have the pieces to pick back up and set things right again. Akin to the end of a good exorcist movie, I get the love of my life back and we don't mention what happened during the time of the possession. It's something that is both mutually feared and mutually welcomed (for that brief moment when the text comes my way that the visitor has arrived). Somehow during this time communication is increased but has ceased to exist at the same time (how does that even work). OK, OK, it's not that bad, but it is a thing that we all have to deal with, whether or not it feels like one or both of us are in the twilight zone. 

~ Mr. P