Sunday, January 16, 2011

The rule of 3

This was introduced to our relationship sometime during our engagement period. It is hard to recall who even came up with it but it works so well that we both take the credit. It goes like this, whenever one of us has been a bit too sarcastic with our speech, or criticized our partner; we have to say 3 kind things to them. This can be anything from a compliment about their appearance to acknowledging something positive about their character or something they did that was thoughtful. Sometimes it’s tricky because the person who was wronged can contest the list if they feel it’s too fluffy and the person at fault has to think of 3 new things. This forces us to pause and reflect on the qualities about our mate that we appreciate, and once that mindset is in place, it’s contagious. Most likely we will carry the rule of 3 into our parenting and our kids will become quite comfortable with complimenting each other and being complimented.
~Mrs. P

This rule has saved a few fights for us and is based upon a simple principle, is my glass half empty or half full? Why focus on the negative when I really should be focusing on just how great I know Danielle is. I then GET to focus on the positive of not only the moment but my wife’s character. These little moments realign my thinking and help me be a better partner. This rule also helps when I’m feeling attacked and I want to feel appeal to the nicer side of my wife. It’s a kick start in the right direction and reminds us of why we’re here in the first place.
~Mr. P 

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